I saw the above image on Facebook and decided to repost a poem I wrote April 2013 after talking to yet one other parent being ignored by their kids. This seems to be so prevalent that I keep hearing more and more stories of children who seem to have forgotten their parents. Sometimes, their estranged behaviors are for valid reasons, but what I find is that most of the time the behavior is over insignificant things that happen, or because of misunderstandings, or because of presumptions and misinformation, yet the adult children turn their back and refuse to even listen to their parent’s side of things or find out if there even is another side to things.
I grew up in a home loaded with physical and emotional abuse, yet as an adult I treated my mom with respect and even tried my hardest to show her God’s love. I drove long distances (my mother never drove on the freeway or anywhere other than a short distance from her home) at inconvenient times of the day (nap time) so that she would get to participate in the lives of her grandchildren for hers as well as the sakes of the kids. Grandkids growing up in this crazy world more than ever need the love of their grandparents.
It seems just about every person I run into knows of someone or is someone who is shunned by the very children they sacrificed themselves to raise. I couldn’t help but think of the Bible verse below.
Mathew 10:21-22 speaking of “the last days” “Brother will betray brother to death, and a father his child; and children will rise up against parents and cause them to be put to death. “You will be hated by all because of My name, but it is the one who has endured to the end who will be saved.…
We wiped bottoms and washed faces,
And took our children to many places.
We cut countless meals into tiny bites,
We made it through untold, sleepless nights.
We survived those frightening, terrible twos,
As parents, we paid all of our dues.
We hugged and kissed little hurts,
We applauded rapid growing spurts.
We read stories and played on the floor,
Our thoughts consumed with nothing more.
Back then they were so dependent,
Now they are constantly, The Defendant.
We cooked their meals and washed their dishes,
Now they ignore our calls, forsake our wishes.
Today we’re forgotten and overlooked,
We invite them over, they’re always booked.
No more children to hold us tight.
Or share a meal with or say goodnight.
Then was a time of love, caring and sacrifice,
Today we are only left with the questions, the whys.
Weeks go by without one phone call,
They say, “Were just too busy, that’s all!”
Forget your wishes, we’re not the type,
To get caught up with visiting on Skype.
We try to be there when they need us,
But they seldom make the time to see us.
Other priorities pull their strings,
Other people to visit, so many things.
We miss out on wonderful holidays,
Times with grandchildren and special days.
We single-parented harder to keep our family together,
And all that we get now is, “Oh please!” and “Whatever!”
They give up our love and our wisdom,
And prefer to continue in narcissism.
We long for days of Green Eggs and Ham,
And lunches made of peanut butter and jam.
Long gone are those days of slumber parties, Disneyland,
And Burt and Ernie, when our kids thought we were grand.
We have made mistakes, that we do face,
Where’s the forgiveness, the love, the grace?
There’s got to be a special place in heaven,
For the very faithful parents we have been.
Our children choose to keep us somewhat far,
Forgotten, abandoned, that’s what we now are.
We gave them our all, we gave them our best,
All that we have now is this type of empty nest.
This is in no way meant as an attack,
We love our children and wish them back.
We just want them to become aware,
That once parents die, it’s too late to care.
By ~ Elizabeth Yalian 2013-2014 ©http://hiseyeisonthissparrow.com. ♛