The month of September will forever be imbedded in my soul as a much different month than the rest of the months.
It is a month of grief and rejoicing all tied into one tight giant knot.
- Grief because God prompted me to visit my 27 year old son, Jonathan, the Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday of the fourth week of September nearly two years ago, to deliver a book I ordered as a gift for him.
It was a great novel about police work. I knew he would love it because he loved to read and because he was a police officer. It was a sort of peace offering, as we had been at odds with each other for quite a while and I wanted it to stop, but didn’t seem to convey it the best or it wasn’t received or something. Always something got in the way. Anyone who has had an extremely unfriendly divorce and terrible relationship with their ex knows what kind of havoc that can bring on the relationship between a parents and their children. Continue reading
Though I can honestly say I rarely run out of a topics to write about, I was not sure what to write about today. I looked at my list and this story stood out.
As I have mentioned before, my life has bounced from one tragedy to another since childhood, to the point at times all I had left to hang on to has been my faith in the living God. And that, by the skin of my teeth.
What I am about to share is an odd story, perhaps some will even doubt my sanity, but as God is my witness, it is as real as I am sitting before my keyboard today.
After all, isn’t our God the God of the impossible, the unexplainable?
Last Friday evening, my bank account went overdrawn by a couple of dollars. Since I hadn’t used my debit card in a few days, and had no outstanding checks; this was a definite red flag alert. I found an unsolicited $93 charge from Oxyfresh Cleansers. I called the phone number associated with the charge on my bank statement, but my call immediately went to this recording. “You have reached customer service. Someone will be with you in 34 minutes.”
You’ve. Got. To. Be. Kidding. Not only had I not ordered anything from Oxyfresh, but I was supposed to wait 34 minutes before, maybe, I would be able to speak to someone, who may or may not, be able or willing to help me. I wasn’t going to go there! I had been scammed.
Sometimes it hits me. The grief, the still foreign concept. I lost a child. He was 27 years old when he died in September of 2011, but he was still my child. They say the loss of a child by far is the heaviest of losses a soul can bear. I agree.
I found another thing they say to be true. They, being the experts on grief and loss. The second year of loss is the worst. I agree. The reality pools around one’s feet. The permanency of this kind of loss becomes a stagnant puddle one must wade through.