Category Archives: Following Christ Has Changed My Life

Why Are You Doing This To Us?

My kids still talk about the time I was the meanest mom ever. And around Christmas even.  My daughters were just reaching their tween years and my son was about eight.

I had already proven myself to be a cruel mother by policing television programs, and limiting their TV and video time to two hours a day. I made them have reflective quiet times spent reading or writing in their journals.  In the summer, I extended the TV-movie time to four hours, after much begging.  We had a large supply of what I called clean movies. Any movie encouraging good morals, respect for parents, caring for others, and loving God, qualified.

But this time, I really outdid myself. I was “forcing” them to almost entirely go off TV and videos, cold turkey, for a month.

“It will be our Christmas present to Jesus. God gave us a part of Himself, in the best present ever: the baby Messiah in the manger.  We give Christmas gifts to each other each year. This year, let’s give God a part of ourselves.  The time we would spend watching TV or movies that exclude Him, let’s instead give to Him as a thank-you and birthday gift.” I said. Continue reading

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Filed under Everydayliving, Everythingelse, Following Christ Has Changed My Life, Gottalaugh, In a Kids World, Life Lessons

Mistaken Identity

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After years of wandering through sullen shadows,

And stretched, somber avenues of abandonment,

Of wearing masks, and living empty echoes of life,

She knew little more than to follow the crowd.

She explored unhealthy places that whispered contentment.

She believed in the hollow promises she sought within.

Singed and torn by unfriendly competition,

She longed to believe that there was something

Of value, one thing, anything, worthy inside of her.

She found no identity to call her very own.

By nineteen, she was overcome by this world.

********** Continue reading

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Filed under A Broken Childhood, Awed by His Love and Grace, Child Abuse and Neglect, Following Christ Has Changed My Life, Inner Sruggles and Heartache, Life Lessons, Poetry, Seeds of Inspirations

A Tribute To The Only Father I Have Ever Known

Father’s day has always been a very painful day for me. I felt the emptiness of never having met my father while growing up. I felt an even greater loss, because he didn’t care about me at all. He walked out on my mother when she wouldn’t abort me. This year, I chose to do something different. I chose to honor the father who has always been faithfully with me, with this poem.

My bio-father wanted me aborted,

A heartbreaking fact I have had to bear.

His wishes, however, were thwarted,

By another father who surely did care.

A father with much richer, future plans,

For this embryo, so fragile and forlorn.

He guarded me with his very own hands,

Instead of allowing my flesh to be torn.

Continue reading

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Filed under A Broken Childhood, Awed by His Love and Grace, Child Abuse and Neglect, Everydayliving, Everythingelse, Following Christ Has Changed My Life, Inner Sruggles and Heartache, Poetry

The Good, The Bad, And The Forever

Last Friday evening, my bank account went overdrawn by a couple of dollars. Since I hadn’t used my debit card in a few days, and had no outstanding checks; this was a definite red flag alert. I found an unsolicited $93 charge from Oxyfresh Cleansers. I called the phone number associated with the charge on my bank statement, but my call immediately went to this recording. “You have reached customer service. Someone will be with you in 34 minutes.”

You’ve. Got. To. Be. Kidding. Not only had I not ordered anything from Oxyfresh, but I was supposed to wait 34 minutes before, maybe, I would be able to speak to someone, who may or may not, be able or willing to help me. I wasn’t going to go there! I had been scammed.

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Filed under Everydayliving, Everythingelse, Following Christ Has Changed My Life, Life Lessons

Dogs Have The Right Idea

I saw a bumper sticker a couple of years ago that left me laughing out loud, in the car, by myself. It imagesaid, “Wag more, bark less.” My dogs are happy dogs. Their joy is quite visible, they wag their tails more times a day than I can count. We all enjoy a dog’s expression of joy–that whirl of wags and wiggles. But, we become easily annoyed when the barking begins. It’s obvious that barking is also stressful for the barking dog. Though funny at first, the true meaning of that quote sunk in, and hit too close to home.

When I was a single mother, I did too much barking and not enough wagging at home. I struggled so much with the my financial situation. I was often anxious, frustrated, and mentally and physically exhausted. My ex-husband didn’t pay child support. Living in a community property state, meant I was also responsible for the unpaid debts he left when he disappeared. I had no family to turn to, and three teenage kids to support. The paychecks I received from multiple part time jobs, only covered three-fourths of the bills. Paying bills became a recurring, juggling act. I grew weary of the threatening, red-letter notices in the mail.

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Filed under Awed by His Love and Grace, Everydayliving, Following Christ Has Changed My Life, Inner Sruggles and Heartache, Just for Fun, Life Lessons, Seeds of Inspirations, Single Parent Struggles, Writing and Author Stuff

Blessed Dreams

imageSometimes it hits me. The grief, the still foreign concept. I lost a child. He was 27 years old when he died in September of 2011, but he was still my child. They say the loss of a child by far is the heaviest of losses a soul can bear. I agree.

I found another thing they say to be true. They, being the experts on grief and loss. The second year of loss is the worst. I agree. The reality pools around one’s feet. The permanency of this kind of loss becomes a stagnant puddle one must wade through.

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Filed under Awed by His Love and Grace, Everydayliving, Following Christ Has Changed My Life, Inner Sruggles and Heartache, Life Lessons, Loss of a Child, Seeds of Inspirations

The Holy Spirit Is To Our Souls What Invisalign Is To Our Teeth

I used to have naturally, perfectly aligned teeth.  More than one dentist I visited assumed I once wore braces.  I never did. Within the past seven years or so however, one particularly stubborn tooth has decided to break rank and go out on its own.  It is the tooth next to my right, top front tooth.

One of my lower, back molars had to be pulled after it cracked in a car accident when I was 18 years old. The dentist suggested I never have the wisdom tooth directly behind it pulled in order for it to partner with the molar directly above it.

“The wisdom tooth will slowly move into the spot of the absent molar. If you don’t keep that wisdom tooth, you will eventually lose the molar above it as the two molars biting down against each other help keep each other in place.”  He said. Continue reading

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Filed under Awed by His Love and Grace, Following Christ Has Changed My Life, Life Lessons, Seeds of Inspirations

Spoiled By Friendship

imageRecently, my friend Kristen invited several friends to her house for a “spa-day of blessings and relaxation.”  She provided us with a fantastic quiche I hope to get the recipe for.  I am not a lemon cake fan, but had seconds of the most delicious lemon cake I ever tasted. The pudding filling and real whipped cream topping made it rich and amazing.  And berry infused teas.  Wow! Continue reading

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Filed under Awed by His Love and Grace, Following Christ Has Changed My Life, Life Lessons, Seeds of Inspirations, Writing and Author Stuff

Author’s B-Log

As I said in the About page, I loved to write when I was young. I wrote poems and silly stories. Even when I wasn’t writing, my mind was creative with words. When my kids were young they loved my made up stories. I’d make one up on the spur-of-the-moment, winging it as I went along then forget the details when they’d beg me to retell it. Each time I’d tell it differently.  They would say something like, “No Mom, the giant lived on the mountain, not in the forest!” And so on. I had as much fun hearing them correct me as I had telling the stories. Continue reading

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Filed under Author's B-Log, Following Christ Has Changed My Life, Inner Sruggles and Heartache, Life Lessons, Writing and Author Stuff