Tag Archives: Loss Of A Child

Sometimes Kids Just Aren’t Ready Yet

When my kids were little I took on the huge responsibility of homeschooling all three on the heels of our move across the country from San Diego, California; to the northwest.

My kids had gone to a small private school for the first couple of grades.  Jonathan, my youngest, had just finished kindergarten.

He did okay in school except for the teacher’s frequent complaints.  Jonathan, she said, was a very “intense” child.

“Jonathan  is not a rude or undisciplined child,” his teacher said,” but he has a difficult time keeping quiet during class, sitting still, not speaking out of turn, and he often corrects the other children on the playground when they aren’t following rules.”

As his parents, we didn’t know what we could do about our son’s “intensity.” Continue reading

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Filed under In a Kids World, Inner Sruggles and Heartache, Life Lessons, Loss of a Child, Seeds of Inspirations

Great Mother-Son Memory

imageI never prayed so hard for a sunny day. I always dreamed of having an outdoor wedding. We chose an upscale turn-of-the-century, Victorian bed and breakfast overlooking a beautiful lake for our wedding and reception.
It had been pouring for days, but God answered my prayer. September 25th 2004 turned out to be a gorgeous day after all.
Shortly after I announced I would be getting married for the second time, my then 20 year old son, Jonathan, actually asked me if he could walk me down the aisle on my wedding day. His question caught me off-guard because Jonathan made it clear he did not like to attend any wedding. I hadn’t planned on anyone walking me down the aisle at all, but after thinking about it for a second or two, I felt flattered that my son would request such a thing. How could I possibly say no to that!

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Filed under Awed by His Love and Grace, Everydayliving, Gottalaugh, Just for Fun, Life Lessons, Loss of a Child, Seeds of Inspirations, Writing and Author Stuff

Just Do It

The month of September will forever be imbedded in my soul as a much different month than the rest of the months.
It is a month of grief and rejoicing all tied into one tight giant knot.
  • Grief because God prompted me to visit my 27 year old son, Jonathan, the Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday of the fourth week of September nearly two years ago, to deliver a book I ordered as a gift for him.

It was a great novel about police work.  I knew he would love it because he loved to read and because he was a police officer. It was a sort of peace offering, as we had been at odds with each other for quite a while and I wanted it to stop, but didn’t seem to convey it the best or it wasn’t received or something.  Always something got in the way.  Anyone who has had an extremely unfriendly divorce and terrible relationship with their ex knows what kind of havoc that can bring on the relationship between a parents and their children. Continue reading

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Filed under Following Christ Has Changed My Life, Inner Sruggles and Heartache, Life Lessons, Loss of a Child

A Touching Story- Boy Wants to be Fireman

Very beautiful. Truly a soul stirring and tissue grabbing story!

booklovers1

In Calgary, Alberta, a 26-year-old mother stared down at her 6 year old son, who was dying of terminal leukemia.
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Although her heart was filled with sadness, she also had a strong feeling of determination. Like any parent, she wanted her son to grow up & fulfill all his dreams. Now that was no longer possible.. The leukemia would see to that. But she still wanted her son’s dream to come true.

She took her son’ s hand and asked,
‘Billy, did you ever think about what you wanted to be once you grew up?
Did you ever dream and wish what you would do with your life?’

Mommy, ‘I always wanted to be a fireman when I grew up.’

Mom smiled back and said, ‘Let’s see if we can make your wish come true.’

Later that day she went to her local fire
Department in Calgary, where she met

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Filed under Awed by His Love and Grace, Everythingelse, In a Kids World, Inner Sruggles and Heartache, Life Lessons, Loss of a Child

Growing Pains

You know that feeling of resistance we naturally get when we are required to step outside our zone of comfort, to push further, strive harder and move past stagnation?

Much like when the momma bird pushes her young to the edge of the nest.  What is that youngling thinking?

“Momma’s off her rocker!”

“She’s trying to kill me!”

“How could she do this to me?”

That little one, paralyzed by fear, becomes frozen as momma gives the final shove.

Down, down it goes until finally it gets this crazy notion to flap its wings… flap, flap, flap… Continue reading

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Filed under Awed by His Love and Grace, Everythingelse, Following Christ Has Changed My Life, Life Lessons, Life with Chronic Pain, Loss of a Child, Single Parent Struggles, Writing and Author Stuff

Celestial Comfort For The Broken Hearted

Though I can honestly say I rarely run out of a topics to write about, I was not sure what to write about today. I looked at my list and this story stood out.

As I have mentioned before, my life has bounced from one tragedy to another since childhood, to the point at times all I had left to hang on to has been my faith in the living God.  And that, by the skin of my teeth.

What I am about to share is an odd story, perhaps some will even doubt my sanity, but as God is my witness, it is as real as I am sitting before my keyboard today.

After all, isn’t our God the God of the impossible, the unexplainable?

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Filed under Awed by His Love and Grace, Everydayliving, Following Christ Has Changed My Life, Loss of a Child, Seeds of Inspirations

I Can Make A Big Mess All By Myself

Since the beginning of mankind, people have had a tendency to blame others. In Genesis 3:11-13, God confronts Adam and Eve after they eat of the forbidden fruit.

God said, “Have you eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded you that you should not eat?”

Adam said, “The woman You gave me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat.”

The LORD God said to the woman, “What is this that you have done?”

Eve said, “The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat…”

Adam blames Eve, indirectly blaming God, “the woman You gave me.” Eve blames the serpent. There you have it. When it comes to humanity, as Solomon said in Ecclesiastics 1:9: “What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun.”

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Filed under Awed by His Love and Grace, Gottalaugh, Inner Sruggles and Heartache, Life Lessons, Loss of a Child, Seeds of Inspirations

The Good, The Bad, And The Forever

Last Friday evening, my bank account went overdrawn by a couple of dollars. Since I hadn’t used my debit card in a few days, and had no outstanding checks; this was a definite red flag alert. I found an unsolicited $93 charge from Oxyfresh Cleansers. I called the phone number associated with the charge on my bank statement, but my call immediately went to this recording. “You have reached customer service. Someone will be with you in 34 minutes.”

You’ve. Got. To. Be. Kidding. Not only had I not ordered anything from Oxyfresh, but I was supposed to wait 34 minutes before, maybe, I would be able to speak to someone, who may or may not, be able or willing to help me. I wasn’t going to go there! I had been scammed.

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Filed under Everydayliving, Everythingelse, Following Christ Has Changed My Life, Life Lessons

Blessed Dreams

imageSometimes it hits me. The grief, the still foreign concept. I lost a child. He was 27 years old when he died in September of 2011, but he was still my child. They say the loss of a child by far is the heaviest of losses a soul can bear. I agree.

I found another thing they say to be true. They, being the experts on grief and loss. The second year of loss is the worst. I agree. The reality pools around one’s feet. The permanency of this kind of loss becomes a stagnant puddle one must wade through.

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Consumed By Necessary Distractions

imageThe biblical story of Mary and Martha is one I can personally relate to.  For those not familiar with the story in Luke 10:38, I will briefly fill you in. The sisters Mary and Martha, are the same whose brother Lazarus was called out of the tomb by Jesus after he had been dead for four days.  John 11:1-44.

“Remove the stone covering the tomb.” Jesus ordered. I can just hear the monumental intake of breath as the many mourners gasped at the thought of the dead man in the tomb, in the heat of the Israeli climate. “ He’s been there four days, there will be a stench,”  Martha told Jesus. Continue reading

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